I am a passport brother who brought his fiancée from Vietnam to the United States. She’s going to get permanent residency aka her green card. Then, we will live in Southern California for a few years. We’ll take this time to prepare for relocating to Southeast Asia in 4-5 years.
This is my retirement plan.
I talk about all things related to the Passport Brothers, and that includes finances, immigration, travel and retirement. And you can find lots of information on my blog or here on YouTube.
So today, what I wanted to briefly talk about is a little bit of storytime. I want to talk about why I decided to bring my fiancée from Vietnam to the United States.
A lot of Passport Brothers like myself and many people, in general, advise against this idea of bringing your overseas girlfriend or your fiance to the United States. And it’s for good reason; the American sisterhood has made its intention clear.
Modern American Women have threatened to go out of their way to poison the minds of all the women who come to the United States from other countries, especially those who readily accept more traditional roles in the house and in the relationship.
Modern American Women want to spread Western Feminism.
More often than not, our overseas girlfriends and spouses have rejected the current phase of feminism and they will have nothing to do with it.
But the sisterhood is a collective mind. And if you don’t believe in things like that, they will come down on you, and come hard for your innocent, fit, feminine, and friendly wife.
So all that being said, I had two choices. I could continue my long-distance relationship with Nghia, or I could start the K1 visa process to bring her to the United States. This would enable us to work on family and finances in the States and then prepare ourselves for the next phase of our life together, which would be taking place in Southeast Asia
Obviously, I’m aware of all of the pitfalls and all the horror stories of what could happen when you bring your overseas girlfriend to the United States. I’ve heard all of the cautionary tales, but to be frank and to be honest, I got tired of being alone.
Long-distance relationships are excruciating.
The Bitter Ending of a Relationship
I had been divorced for five years before I met my current wife. During those five years, there were a lot of things going on and I was trying to focus on spending time with my children. I was managing them and trying to keep things peaceful and steady for them at the time. My ex-wife and I split the week in half for 50/50 custody. So on the days that I didn’t have my kids, I went out on dates and I brought women home.
But, I was not ready for dating or relationships. I was still bitter towards women after my divorce.
Looking back, I’m glad I wasn’t ready for it because if I was, I probably would have settled for one of the women that I was dating. For sure, the issues I faced dating several years ago are similar to what you guys (of all ages) are experiencing right now in the dating world.
Back then, it was crazy. The people that I met were unhinged, narcissistic, naive, ignorant or amazingly deluded. At first, they seemed okay, but after a while the red flags started popping up like Prairie Dogs.
Being Alone as a Man, Isn’t So Bad
That’s when I really just decided that I was going to be alone. And I had resigned myself to living my life as a retired man, not having a wife and not having a girlfriend, and I was sure I was going to be alone with my grandchildren – if I ever had any.
I wasn’t prepared for the double standards and BS that come with women and relationships. But then I met a young lady where I worked. She was Vietnamese. And we dated for a year.
That relationship opened my eyes to another side of this whole relationship thing. As flighty as she was, she still treated me in a way I had never experienced. Not even in marriage.
That relationship showed me that my perspective on relationships was limited and incomplete., and that there was this other being a beautiful picture. It told me that for me there is a feminine counterpart out there that was more enticing than the overly aggressive, masculine, selfish women I’d come to know.
After that relationship was over, I sat back and I thought and I said,
“Hey, you know what? I think I do want to have a relationship. I think I do want to get married again. I think I do prefer to have, you know, a partner in the later years of my life just to, you know, get out there and experience things with.”
The Limited Longevity of Long-Distance Relationships
I started looking, actively looking, and I started dating, and then one thing led to another.
Ultimately Nghia and I connected through her relative who worked in the same business park as I. Nghia was in Vietnam, however. We were just going to do the long-distance friendship thing, but she was wifey material.
As we got more and more infatuated with each other I flew out to Vietnam for a one-on-one, in-person visit. Nghia and I had a great time, and I decided that we should try to make this thing real.
So obviously we had to deal with the idea of her staying in Vietnam with me staying in the United States. She had some local friends with spouses working in Japan so the idea wasn’t new.
We convinced each other that seeing each other just a few times a year might work. We had to consider the LDR thing because it was a real issue that we both had good jobs and careers to manage. Also, I had four children from marriage who were all under eighteen at the time.
Nghia had a plan to get her certification in English and use that to transfer locations to someplace in Europe or Japan where they conduct business in English.
Why Did I Bring Her So Close to the Sisterhood
But as time went along and we found ourselves contemplating trying to plan for this long-distance trip, what we found was that life got in the way, and something always came up. In the end, the gap in time between visits was increasing.
We had to figure out if this long-distance thing consisting of two, maybe three visits a year, was something that we wanted to do, and it wasn’t. And so we started the K1 Fiance visa process to bring her to the United States.
Here’s the part where I hear a loud sigh across the room. I know that a lot of people, a lot of guys, read this and say, “Awww man. Why did you do that? You’re crazy. You crazy, crazy.” And you’re right. It is a crazy move.
But you have to look at your foundation and you have to look at what your process is to combat stuff like people trying to hijack your spouse’s mind. It’s like, what: What’s your antidote to all the poison that’s coming out?
There was always vitriol that the Sisterhood had ready to inject into your wife’s or your fiance’s mind.
What Nghia and I do is we talk about all of that stuff. We regularly have conversations because she goes to class with a lot of folks who’ve been in the States longer than she has.
And so the Americanization of those people has already started.
The Antidote to Feminist Poison
Nghia can look at where their life is and contrast it to what they have going on, or what they don’t have. Then she says, “Okay, I don’t want to go in that direction.”
And then we come home and we talk about those things. So we have these long conversations and they’re usually very light-hearted.
And so that’s our process of dealing with the poison. We have our own antidote, and our antidote is communication. It’s open communication between the two of us that we share everything.
We embrace our routine. We use that as a forcefield around us to keep all of those poisonous sisterhood means for penetrating our lives so that we can have a stable existence and is working well right now.
The Reality of Yearly Visits in LDR
And so the alternative was to have some sort of long-distance relationship in which we rarely saw each other. How can you prevent third parties or outside influences from infecting your relationship if you’re only seeing her for two weeks at a time, every 6 to 9 months at a time,
We wake up together, we go to bed together, we watch TV together, we cook together, we eat together, we laugh together, we go out together. We do all of these things together. So we have constantly joined forces, arm in arm, fighting all of these knuckleheads out here who are trying to inject their bullshit feminist ideology into my wife.
If I didn’t see her for nine months, it would make the above task that much harder, trying to sustain a long-distance relationship.
Conclusion
This is why I brought my fiancee to the United States as opposed to having a relationship with her in Vietnam. Long-distance relationships allow for third parties to seep their way in. Being close and living our daily lives together allows us to team up and combat negative forces as a unit.
Now we’re married, and strong and stable. I can see the effects of poisonous talk in real time. I don’t have to wait six months to see the expressions on my girlfriends face when someone says something crazy or dangerous.
If my story has somehow inspired you, or you can use my story to help a friend, please leave a comment and subscribe. I want to try to make a lot more videos a lot more often to share my journey with you so that if you are a passport guy just like me who wants to bring his wife, fiance, a spouse to the United States temporarily, you’ll know exactly what to do.